"Madam Widow's Demise"
"Madam Widow's Demise" is the tale of Aeric's Night of Grand Questing, known colloquially as "Hell Night."  As this account was written four years after the fact and had to draw heavily from the actual script of the story, there are most likely some discrepencies between what was supposed to happen and what actually did happen (as is the case in every Hell Night or short story). 

     It was the Saveign season in O.P. XVII.  The Pages In Black had come to Warwick at a tumultuous time, for the realm was on the verge of war thanks to the influence of the Gewruw(?) on the Client Kingdom of Lyonesse.  Farqhuar, the Bailiff for that page-turning season, was sent to Lyonesse as a peace- seeking ambassador.  Several weeks later and with still no word from Farqhuar, the Companions were preparing themselves for war with Lyonesse. 
     Conveniently enough, an arms merchant known only as Madam Widow decided to set up shop in Warwick at about this time.  After she had come into Court to promote her wares, King Danzig decided to send the pages to buy everything Widow had, in preparation for the war as well as to prevent her from selling to the other side (or any of the realm's other enemies in the future). 
     On the appointed night, the Pages In Black were met by one of the royal guardsmen, who guided them to Madam Widow's abode in Keltian.  En route, the group encountered the comical and bizarre Knights of Nut, who fled in terror upon utterance of the Widow's name. 
     Upon reaching Madam Widow's abode, the pages were told that they had to journey to the actual weapon shop itself, which was located on the border of Lyonesse in Elven.  She sent her henchman, a strange bee-creature named Beezer, to guide them there. 
     On the way to the shop, the pages met the blind sage Athos in Glastonbury.  Athos spoke to them about their past, as well as their future, and warned them to be on their best behavior should they encounter any Lyonesseans. 
     Further on down the road, the pages encountered a pair of shady looking fellows who were "taking bets on who would survive(?)."  In the ensuing fight, one of the two was killed, and then graciously brought back to life (for questioning) with a Life Pill. 
     Finally, the pages reached the weapon shop.  After a brief interaction, a deal is struck, and the salesman informs the pages that the weapons will be delivered to the Companions.  Just then, a breathless messenger entered the shop and informed the salesman that Farqhuar had been taken hostage by General Blackbriar in Lyonesse!  The salesman passed this information on to the pages who, after a brief division as to how to handle the situation, charged headlong into Lyonesse--by way of Warwick Transit--to save their wayward Bailiff. 
     The pages arrived in Lyonesse at the mouth of a dark and overgrown path.  After sufficiently bribing the guard for passage, the pages ventured down this dark path, only to be attacked and killed by assassins!  Fortunately for the pages, the magic of the Life Pills brought each of them back to life. 
     The pages continued down the path and eventually found themselves in a wide open field.  When crossing this field, they were suprised by a large, fish-like creature.  This seemingly friendly creature, which went by the name of Bubbles, spoke to the pages for a while until a terrible landshark appeared and chased it away.  Dauntless, the pages pressed on. 
     On the other side of the field, the pages encountered a number of Lyonessean soldiers giving a young man a good thrashing.  When the pages appeared on the scene, the soldiers turned their attention to them.  Before the pages had a chance to start an international incident, a man who was apparently the sergeant in charge of the soldiers (Sergeant Dunbin) appeared and broke it all up.  He made mention of the general and how they were told not to start a war they didn't want.  After learning the identity of the pages and their mission, the sergeant offered to take them to see the general himself--after he took care of his men.  He asked the pages to meet him at the Bar With No Name, and then they all departed, leaving the poor, badly-beaten boy in the hands of the pages.  The boy, whose named turned out to be Gil, was grateful to the pages for saving him from the soldiers and offered to guide them into Lyonesse proper. 
     By this time, all the pages were somewhat tired from their journey, especially Mistress Panthra, who, due to a mishap earlier in the week, was forced to hobble about on crutches.  Luckily for all, a lunch wagon catering to the soldiers was still in the area; despite their proud Warwickian tabards, the lunch lady mistook them for Lyonessean soldiers and gave them all free food.  After a brief rest stop, the group continued on their journey. 
     Shortly after leaving the lunch wagon, the group came across nothing less than the spectre of Death himself!  The Grim Reaper blocked the pages' path, saying that in order for them to proceed, they had to prove themselves worthy to be Companions (don't ask me why), and to do so they had to embrace death.  One by one, the pages passed through the voluminous folds of Death's robes, emerging unscathed on the other side.  Seemingly satisfied with their performance, the Reaper allowed the group (including Gil) to continue on their way. 
     As befitting their recent encounter with Death, the next thing the pages came across was a graveyard.  This garden of stone was populated by Madam Widow's many late husbands, all of which had met terrible ends, as the pages' guide (Gil) explained. 
     Shortly after leaving the graveyard, the pages encountered a trio of jesters lurking behind a large brick building.  Unfortunately for us (but perhaps fortunately for the jesters), Master Aeric was forced to answer the call of nature and therefore missed the majority of this scene.  After the jesters were brushed aside, the pages continued onward--and downward, by way of a long and treacherous flight of stairs.  Mistress Panthra, who was in no shape to do stairs by virtue of her being on crutches, was carried down the stairs on the back of Master Lucerne, who was noted for his strength and great height. 
     Some time later, the pages came across a wayward group of trolls, who insisted that the pages join them in doing the infamous Dirt Dance that trolls are so well-known for.  Sometime during this exchange, the hapless Gil was bonked on the head by one of the trolls (presumably by accident) and knocked unconscious.  Luckily for the pages, F-f-f-fritz, a man who was raised by trolls (and who would later join the Court of Light as a Companion) was in the vicinity visiting his adoptive family.  F-f-f-fritz offered to help the pages find General Blackbriar in place of Gil, who was reluctantly left in the care of the shoe-eating trolls. 
     Guided by F-f-f-fritz, the pages travelled to the Bar With No Name, where they found a large and rowdy group of soldiers that was just this side of a barroom brawl over their differing opinions of the general.  Once again, Sergeant Dunbin appeared and returned order to the scene.  After apologizing for the behavior of his men, he led the pages out of the bar and in the direction of the general. 
     After a brief (and bloodless) encounter with three assassins (the Butcher, the Baker, and the Candlestick Maker), the group arrived at Blackbriar's estate.  The pages were brought inside and given refreshments; they were told that the general would return shortly, and that they should just relax until he did.  Eventually General Blackbriar entered the room, and after a brief report-slash- introduction by the sergeant, the pages were taken to a private chamber upstairs to speak with the general.  It seemed that the general did not have Farqhuar hostage; in fact, he had sent the Bailiff home to Warwick with a letter agreeing to an armistice.  When told of Madam Widow, the general's face darkened.  He told them that Madam Widow was an evil spirit currently possessing the body of his sister.  Sadly, he knew of no other way to stop her  or to free his sister from the Widow's power, and so he gave the pages the Dagger of Raede, the only weapon with the power to kill Madam Widow. 
     No sooner did General Blackbriar hand the pages the weapon of his sister's destruction than the lights went out, and a strange sensation of vertigo overwhelmed the pages.  When they could see again, they saw that the general's abode was in shambles, and that everyone had disappeared.  Going downstairs, they encountered a pair of people scavaging through the mess.  They quickly learned that this was the Lyonesse of the future; the war had come and gone, leaving Lyonesse in ruins.  The scavengers also told the pages that it was not safe for them to be there, and they offered to take them to the Court. 
     En route to the Citadel, the group encountered a mysterious puppet show which told the tale of the pages' quest thus far, as well as explaining the strange time warp they had suffered.  Just then, on the cue of the puppet show, orcs came out of nowhere and attacked the pages. 
     After fending off the orks, the scavangers took the pages to the Courtroom.  However, this was not the Court of Light that they had come to know and love.  The banners were all hanging upside down and the minstrels were playing discordant music.  On the table, a (human-sized) fairy was dead and cooked, ready to be eaten by the "Comapions" there.  The king, who appeared to be Sirrah Marduk, paid the scavangers for bringing the pages to him. 
     King Marduk then explained that the chaos of the war with Lyonesse allowed the evil dragon Shadowcast to come in and take over both realms as his own.  The pages were then taken up some stairs to a large chamber where they came face to face with the demon-dragon himself.  When the pages refused to become his servants, Shadowcast became angry and ordered them to be taken out and executed.  Before this could happen, however, one of Shadowcast's minions revealed himself to be Magius Fangorn Flynarrel, the Crimson Avenger, who had not been corrupted by the demon-dragon's influence.  He held off the other minions, giving the pages a chance to escape. 
     Fleeing from the Citadel, the pages were met by an Enchantress named Milikin who claimed to be from the pages' time.  She said that they had to go back to their own time and destroy Madam Widow before the terrible events of this time could occur.  To do this, she took the pages to Glastonbury and together they performed a "time warp" spell which did the trick.  She also gave them the Ruby of Glasturoth, which was the true weapon to use against Madam Widow; the Dagger of Raede would only work against her minions. 
     The pages hurried from Glastonbury back to Dahruth Emyn Caerna to confront Madam Widow.  As promised, the Dagger worked to great effect on one of Widow's two minions, but the one known as Beezer managed to get away.  Master Lucerne wielded the Ruby before Madam Widow, rendering her powerless, while Master Aeric struck the killing blow. 
     Leaving Widow's abode, the pages came across Farquhar, who was dazed and confused, clearly the after-effects of Madam Widow's magic.  After a quick explanation, the Bailiff and the pages hurried to Windsor Castle, where they found the Companions (minus the king) preparing for war with Lyonesse.  Breathless, the pages brought forth Farqhuar and explained what had happened with Madam Widow.  Relieved that war had been averted, the Premier squired each of them on the spot. 

The End.
 
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